You Want Me to Go Where??

Working overnights as I do (Hey, I VOLUNTEERED to work this shift), I've become an adrenaline junkie. If there was a 12-Step program for us, I'd be up there saying, "Hello. I'm newshutr and I have a problem." I get a lot of spot news. Quite frankly, I enjoy it. It's fun and it never really gets too old for me.

However, there are certain things that can drive you just completely, over the top nutso. Like trying to break in a new overnight desk person. You know what is going to make the air and what isn't. You know what is important, and what isn't (for the most part). Well, if you get a new overnight desk person, educate them. They probably are fresh out of college and eager to make an impression and "get that big story". They need to have their hand held. And the training they get from the morning and evening people is not adequate.

For example, the MVA that I've been sent out on, is not that big of a deal. How do I know?? Because I'm here, checking it out. The victim is outside the car talking to the police. There is a slight dent in the right front panel of the bumper. No blood. No bodies. No ambulance. In fact, the cops are pissed that I showed up. They think I'm spying on them. No story here.

What..?? You want it shot?? Why??? Because you told me to?? Ok...we'll chat later.

Things like that really drive me bananas. I mean ape shit crazy. Look, trust me, I'm a pro. I've been doing this for 15 years. For the most part, I know what a scene looks like and what isn't a scene. I'm your eyes in the field, missy. TRUST ME

One of my favorite overnight desk stories is from a few years ago. We had a new girl on the desk. 23 I think she was. Jamilea was her name. Nice girl. Go getter. Anxious to make it in the business. They all are.

My radio beeps and I get the call, "I have a fire somewhere. It's a big fire. But, I can't find it. Can you start to drive and look for it??"

Ummm...sssuuure. It's in Cleveland, somewhere??

"Yeah..I think so.", she said.

Should I head east, west or south???

"Ummm..hold on...well, can you see it from where you're at?"

No..I'm in my car, outside the station. And since I don't know where the fire is, I can't head in that direction

"Shh..hold on.. OK..wait..It's in Parma County!! But they're not saying where in Parma County. Can you drive around the county and see if you can find it?"

Ohhh..yeah..Parma County..sure...I'll head that way and see if I see it.

(NOTE TO THE READER:Here in Northeastern Ohio, Parma is a city. It's the 6th largest city in Ohio and is the fabled home of Drew Carey. It's a big suburban city.)

Five minutes later, Jamelia is on the radio, "Did you find it??"

Nope...Parma County is a big area. Plus it's not that close. It'll take me a while to get there and then find it.(NOTE AGAIN: Parma is about 5 minutes away from Cleveland)

"Ok..well, let me know when you get there."

Ok. Hey, for what it's worth, why don't you try calling Parma and ask them if they have a fire somewhere in the county.

Two minutes later, as I'm crossing the border into Parma, I get, " Hey..did you know Parma is a city??", over the radio.

I couldn't respond to her. I was laughing so hard. I was literally in tears.


Oh, I found the fire. I actually drove up on it. The big fire was a grease fire. The FD put it out with an extinguisher.

Like I said, I love my job...or didn't I say that before?